Welcome to another adventure from the Thousand Acre Woods deep within Trollheim of the NJ Pine Belt! Tales Chronicled by Jonathan Hulton... Have you ever heard of Nissen? No. Good, keep it that way...

"Watch where you're going!" Helgi snapped as Angrboda ran past, chasing a cat out of the house.

"Mom, they're getting into my room!"

"Oh! I have worse fish to fry."

"What can be worse than these cats?"

"I need to go deal with the Nissen," Helgi said under breath. "The cows are dry again."

"Are you sure it wasn't one of those murderous nocks or Hectate?"

"Yes, it's the nisse," Helgi said, holding her head in her hand. "Gramps came home drunk and ate his porridge."

"Oh! Good luck..."

The cats just stopped, shook their heads, apologized, gave their condolences, and crawled back into their cat holes. Nobody likes dealing with the Nisse.

Helgi slowly walked to the stable.

There she met Hogarth, the nisse.

On every farm, there is a nisse. They fulfill the most useless and mundane jobs on the farm. The wort is they expect to be paid for unneeded jobs. They are kind of like politicians. They occupy an unnecesary occupation. They command top dollar, and at the end of four years, if you're lucky, you have no idea what they did. And Hogarth was the worst.

"What did you do to my cows?" asked Helgi, brandishing a hockey stick.

"I hope you cleaned that stick before you came here…"

"Don't worry, I won't miss hitting your tiny head."

"Will you join me at my table to discuss you heifers?"

"Sidhe Accords in effect?"

"Certainly"

"OK."

Helgi shrunk down to Hogarth's size and entered his home underneath the new cow shed.

An exquisite meal was placed before Helgi. Though, she was smart enough not to eat it. Fairy food is cursed, anybody who eats it will be stuck in the sidthe forever as their slaves. So she just kept up a lively discord, that afforded her the time not to eat any.

 

Above they could hear Bjorn bringing in the cows.

"One, two, three, four, five,..." Hogarth began to count.

Then a torrent poured through the dirt and straw above, right onto Helgi's plate. It smelled horrible.

Helgi just looked at him.

"Yes, every night during my dinner."

"Did you try moving your table?"

"Yes. Do you know, how many cows you have up there?

"It's not like they are going to go to the corner outhouse... Anyway, would you like walking through puddles in your living room!"

"Understood, I'll have Bjorn pasture them tonight and move the shed tomorrow."

Hogarth walked her back up. She was still carrying her stick.

Helgi then swatted him over her house, just for fun.

 

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